#1133 June 25, 2007 Union Station Metro – The ADHD Hash

Hares: Motor Mouth, Follow the Bleeder, Gimmie an Oh
Virgins: Just Alicia
Visitors: Are You In (Albequerce), Timber Balls (Seoul), My Boyfriend Joe (Dallas), 4Play (Dallas)
Beer Bitch: Just Diana
Long Time Noseers: Are You In, Coin Operated, True Tail, Blank Shot Up the Ass, I'd Do Her, Back Snatch and Sticky Throttle
Analversaries: Puppy (69 runs), Poop Wiener (25 runs)
Brew Crew: Please Step Away from the Whores
OnOnOn: Union Pub

This sweatfest of a hash started out from Union Station and wove through the back alleys of the Northeast DC. It remained relatively un eventful to the beer check, where the hares had discreetly written BEER VAN in chalk with a big arrow in the parking lot of the old train station. From there we ran through a back alley dog fight and the residents of Sursum Corda came out of their cooperative housing to cheer on the "marathoners."

Note to Future Hares: If Motor Mouth or I'd Do Her show up to your trail, you'll need to pull Gay Guy Counter aside and remind him that their presence at the hash does not mean it is OK for him to run through the neighborhoods of DC addressing everyone as "Ma Brotha." They are not his personal Black Ambassadors.

Violations:

• 
  Mind the Clap is a filthy, dirty race-ist who showed up to the hash on Monday with her age still written on the back of her calf from a triathlon she competed in on Sunday (did we mention that she won her age group?)
• 
  Coin Operated tried to pay for today's hash with a 2 Euro piece. She also bolted into the circle at the opportunity to undress Jack-Off Lantern
• 
  Test Tube Baby traded in his luxury model dog for the off road version
• 
  Poop Wiener drank as th resident idiot in A-Salt My Ass's place.
• 
  Motor Mouth was so desperate for a 4th hare that he was trying to recruit people during opening circle.
• 
  Dildo Shaggins was heard complaining that "There isn't enough meat at this hash." when she saw we were out of Slim Jims, which caused Two Lips in the Bush to shout out to the circle: "I have a small dick!" Apparently Double Header's Tourette's is rubbing off on him.
• 
  The only reason Please Step Away from the Whores worked Brew Crew tonight was that he could only shake $4 out of the homeless guys at Union Station

• 
  Octopussy: Ran into Gay Guy Counter on the metro, carrying the Hash Shit, and asked him "Are you going to the hash?"
• 
  U.S. Boobs and Oral Report: Whined about the fact that she's "been hashing to 10 years and I've never had the Hash Shit!"
• 
  Gay Guy Counter: Read a bit too much into his scribing duties last week and took it upon himself to re-name Rosary Anal Beads while under the influence (of her pussy)
• 
  Motor Mouth: Singing songs wishing for a BJ from Harriers instead of Harriettes, followed shortly by announcing to the circle that a woman was not going to get in his pants if he had anything to say about it.