#1115 - March 4, 2007 - Ladies Night

WH4 Trail #1115 – March 4, 2007 – Ladies Night

Location: Cleveland Park Metro – Red Line

Hares:

OnOnOn: Atomic Billiards

Virgins: Just Angie (single), Just Barbara (married) and Just Christina (single)

Visitors: Just Carrie (Houston) and Just Assflac (Chicago)

Beer Bitch: Big Bang

Brew Crew: Wookin Pa Nub and Please Step Away from the Whores

Analversaries: none



This is Double Header and Cock-a-Doodle-Do-Me reporting to you on the ass-ent that was the 1,115th hash of WH4. Cocky, I have to say, things didn’t look good from the start when the hares couldn’t agree on how many Turkey/Eagle splits were on trail, but the surprise at the end made it all worth while.



The runners were on-out and on-up, up, and up. You’d think with this being Ladies Night a girl could have found a little action going down. Not on this trail. The hares neglected to include “sherpa” on their list of things to bring. Fortunately Red Eye Vagina showed up in case anyone needed to be rescued at altitude. Apparently there was a run on flour this week because our hares were marking very conservatively. Turbo Twat, leave your teaspoon at home next time, reach down and grab a healthy handful. If you have questions, talk to Bad Ditch, she’s an old pro at this. At one point the runners came upon Put-It-Out sitting in the woods, rocking back and forth mumbling something about “Last mark? Anybody seen last mark?” It was sad really.



The runners came stumbling out of Rock Creek Park to the beer check. Read My Lips spotted 3 cowboys galloping through and open field and offered them each blow job if they would let her straddle their steeds. She managed to get rejected by all 3, it seems that her cowboy gay-dar is faltering with Backdoor Buckaroo away.

Meanwhile on the walkers trail, Mr. Magoo showed everyone the proper position for "men" when the lady is on top after he landed flat on his back taking the chicken trail split. Silver Spooge then nervous Mr. Magoo would be swarmed by all the ladies and wanted some tail for himself, asked every harriette to massage his groin. After being turned down by the harriettes, Silver Spooge then moved on to the male hashers.


From the beer check ending circle was only a quickie away, but the surprise in store was well worth getting screwed. The hares had laid out their best spread. Burgers, dogs, cookies and peeps. Chicken Fucker took the meat out of his mouth long enough to announce that the best part of being FRB was the hot sausage sandwich waiting for him at the end. He got violated for that, as did some of you other wankers:



  • Rose Butt: overheard telling Mellow Foreskin Cheese about a new fungal treatment that he hoped would work this time.

  • Cock-a-Doodle-Do-Me and Peace O’ Chum: racists for running the Baltimore-Annapolis half marathon this morning.

  • Winn Dickme and Horney Grail: decided turn the turkey trail into an O, o, o, God trail.
  • Cleopapsmear: too cheep for IVF, is now collecting used condoms and storing them in her freezer for later use.
  • Mind the Clap: When asked to donate her hair to Locks of Love was confused about where the 10inches of hair should come from. Needless to say she did not choose the hair on her head.
  • Assflac: he was sooo excited to be back with pudjam that in preparation for his visit he wanted to make his package look bigger. So he shaved his balls. Ouch!
  • Can't find pussy in a haystack: can't find a true trail sign either even when he's standing on it.
  • CumDumpling: Said, "Cock tastes awesome with a little bbq sauce." Not that there's anything wrong with being gay but.....



After last weeks debacle with the Hashit, we were glad to have it back for a do over. The nominee’s were:

  • Assflac: stand in for A Salt My Ass, equally intelligent and better looking. Look out ladies!!

  • Test Tube Baby: For last week’s trail

  • Turbo Twat: competitive haring, she wouldn’t share the trail map with Bad Ditch because she “didn’t want her to know the trail better than me.”

  • Hokie No Pokie: He’s been too safe lately

  • Jack-Off Lantern: Even with a condom from 1999, he still couldn't get laid. Not updating his porn collections since 1985, he must love tan lines. And at crucial moment he kicked over his beer, thus exposing long standing record of alcohol abuse.

And the winner is…Jack-Off Lantern for alcohol abuse.

Everyone then skipped along to Atomic Billiards for some jolly good wholesome fun! ie trying to see how many masticated chicken wings fit up Bob Loblah's butt.



OnOut

Double Header and Cock A Doodle Do Me