10th Anal Bill Wagner and Friends Birthday Hash

Hares: The Two Bill Wagners, Short Bus Bitch, #2, Hasher Humper, and Nasty When Wet
Start: Ballston Parking Deck
OnOnOn: Mellow's House

Lets talk about Death for a minute. Not death like when you croak,
but Death as in the guy that comes for you when you keel over. I know
it's not usually a topic that we discuss in the WH4 Blog, but it's
important just this once. For those of you that showed up to the hash
on June 19th for the Bill Wagner Birthday hash you'll understand.
Bill Wagner the Elder, Mellow Foreskin Cheese, and Bill Wagner the
Younger, Big Bird Turd, have a combined age much higher than hashers
can count and they've both dodged Death for years. Apparently, a
giant thunderstorm just in time for their hash was their reward.

MM (Hokie No Pokie represented 90% of it) finally decided that it
wasn't going to stop raining and sent the younger, faster Bill Wager,
Big Bird Turd, on out with a 3 second head start. A few hashers were
actually confused by this and after passing BBT wondered why there was
no trail. No one got up the nerve to pants BBT though.

Short Bus Bitch led a pack of stroller mom's and slightly confused
hashers on what was originally the trail according to her map. BBT
took the rest of the pack on a nice short trail to the first shot
check. SBB and friends missed that shot check, but showed back up at
the beer check. There were plenty of more shot checks and then a
short hop into the end at Mellow's house.

There was one virgin Just Andy who was brought by Just Mike. We had a
few virgins whose names are slightly legible after the rain. We had
something or other D*ck Sucker, Two Timing Hymen, Just Stephanie from
Blacksburg, and someone from Chicago whose name I didn't catch.

There were so many violations it was kind of fun trying to get Bleeder
to run out of songs. What was left of the stroller patrol were
violated for bringing their kids to the hash so that they didn't have
to give them a bath. Short Bus Bitch was a sweeper and came in before
about 20 hashers. She always was a bit impatient. Bleeder for
rejecting a ride in the rain and then jumping in the car like a little
girl. In a related note, Penis Pen Pal for giving Bleeder a ride.
Big Bird Turd for cherry picking his nuts at the snack table. One of
the visitors was so happy to be in America that when he slipped he
kissed the earth. Hard! For Sale or Rent for walking past a stack of
"FREE" lawn chairs. There were lots of others, but my pad of paper
was soggy and I didn't get them all.

There were a few Analverseries: Snot has 325 runs, DQ has 50, Fiddy &
Ducky in an ugly showing of togetherness got their 300th at the same
time. They only had one track suit for the two of them so Fiddy go
the pants, go figure.

There were a crap load of Long Time No Seers like DQ, Burnt Sox, Thong
and Schlong, and one of the hares, Big Bird Turd.

The hash shit was awarded the week before to Douches Wild who
apparently drove home topless by "mistake" one evening. Tit-ly Winks
volunteered Obeseologist for heading to Niagra Falls and was going to
hare in Buffalo. She thought it would look nice while he hared. It
came out that she was going to Niagra Falls too and the hash decided
she'd look better with it.

Tit-ly wrapped up the circle with a rousing rendition of Swing Low.