WH4 hash 1129 - June 4, 6:30 pm -- Bethesda Metro

Ahh, summer.  The air is hot and getting muggier every day, news reporters start saying things like "Code Orange", and oddly, the heater in my office turns on and bakes me all day.  And not in a good way.

But I don't like to complain about summer.  Very soon, wonderful things start happening in Pudjamtown.  The kiddies will be released from school, and fewer teachers and buses on the road makes it much easier to get to my sauna/office.  Those same teachers will be forced to come up with new ways to fend off a drunken hasher's advances -- "but I have class early tomorrow" ain't gonna cut it anymore! 

But the best part of this time of year is simple -- it's intern season.  Every June, poor, naive, impressionable college students pour into this town to work for a hometown Rep, or a think tank or what have you.  For most of them, this is their first experience going to a bar in a big city.  They can be found after work at any place that sells cheap drinks and cheap (or free) food.  And since you're already there, it will be very convenient to hit on them.  And really, it's only being hospitable to make them feel welcome by buying them tequila shots.  Incidentally, intern season is also the only time during the year a hasher will impress someone by buying a round of $1.50 Rolling Rocks.  So go ahead and step up the place this summer.  It would be rude not to.

And you know what interns like best after tequila and Rolling Rock?  A good ASS FUCKING!

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Upcumming Trails
 
6/11 -- L'il Red Ride Me Good & Friends -- DeeCee -- TOUR DUH HASH
6/15 -- Full Moon hash -- WH4's 20th Birthday!!
6/18 -- Mellow Foreskin Cheese -- Ballston

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Full Moon trail is Friday (6/1) night.  Go drink some Blue Moon during a Blue Moon.  Or something.  If you can figure out what the announcement says, let me know.

The Tour duh Hash schedule was taking up too many column-inches.  Go find it here.

Baltimore-Annapolis H3 is holding their 1000th Trail celebration on a camping trip.  It'll be June 8-10.  Details Here.

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground!

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Hash #1129 -- June 4, 2007 -- 6:30 pm -- Bethesda Metro

Hares: Takes it up the Eh!, Hungry Hungry Homo, F=MA, Just Tom

Start: Bethesda Metro, corner of Old Georgetown Road and Wisconsin Ave

WH4 hashes 1127 & 1128 - May 27-28th, 3:00 pm - Arlington

I've been writing about this Tour duh Hash thing for a few months now.  I hope I've made you all excited but clueless as to what it is.  It's essentially an excuse to go out and drink - I mean hash - every night for 8 days.  If that doesn't quite do it for you, here's the long version: you may have noticed that hashes are a bit clique-y.  Like fraternities, every group gets drunk in their own way, and clearly the method your group chooses is the best.  (Not that I'd ever condone making fun of other hash groups.)  To painfully extend the analogy, the Tour duh Hash is a mixer.  We want everyone to go to everyone else's hash that week, have a couple down-downs, and strike up a conversation with that attractive hasher from that "other" kennel. 

The Full Moon trail that week is going to be hared by WH4.  Coincidentally, it's also White House's 20th Analversary, along with a quartet of hares turning 40!  Hooray for a 180 years of irresponsibility and poor decision making!  Hooray beer!


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Upcumming Trails

6/4 -- Takes it up the Eh & friends -- Bethesda
6/11 -- L'il Red Ride Me Good & Friends -- DeeCee -- TOUR DUH HASH
6/15 -- Full Moon hash -- WH4's 20th Birthday!!
6/18 -- Mellow Foreskin Cheese -- Ballston


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Tour duh Hash Schedule

June 10 Sunday  - OTH4
June 11 Monday - WH4
June 12 Tuesday - SHIT
June 13 Wednesday - Great Falls
June 14 Thursday - EWH3
June 15 Friday - Full Moon
June 16 Saturday - Mt Vernon (10am)
June 16 Saturday - DCH4 (2pm)
June 17 Sunday - BAH3

Baltimore-Annapolis H3 is holding their 1000th Trail celebration on a camping trip.  It'll be June 8-10.  Details Here.

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground!

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WH4 hash 1126 - May 20th, 3:00 pm - McLean

Being appointed hareraiser is a harrowing journey.  For those ignorant of the process, I'll explain briefly.  Step one is to have approximately 2-3 more beers than prudent at the ending circle.  If you've lost track of your beer intake, that point is after breaking the seal, but before finding yourself the subject of a hickie-giving contest and wearing a shirt that says "Boy Toy."  Not that I would know...  Step two is to declare to an RA or GM or whatever, that you'll be in mismanagement, "but only something that doesn't require me to speak to large groups of drunk people."  Successful candidates will move onto the third step, which is an extensive interview session.  The interview goes something like this:

Q. Do you own a computer?
A. Yes.
Q. You're hired.
A. Cool.

With all my qualifications, I guess it shouldn't be too surprising that some of you entertainment-starved basketcases actually enjoy these little intros.  But after two weeks of basically saying, "Fuck off, here's how to get to the start" I must admit that I'm feeling some pressure to write something funny or intriguing.   So I'll leave you with one thought for the week.  On Tuesday, Rev Jerry Falwell was found in his office with neither respiration nor a heartbeat.  It's possible he had not been in that state for very long, and therefore might have been resuscitated.  Do you think his Liberty University co-workers administered CPR?

Or would that have been too gay?

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Upcumming Trails

5/27 -- Memorial Day trail & Picnic -- Near Ballston
5/28  -- Crapload of hares -- TBA
6/4 -- Takes it up the Eh & friends -- Bethesda

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Tour duh Hash Schedule

June 10 Sunday  - OTH4
June 11 Monday - WH4
June 12 Tuesday - SHIT
June 13 Wednesday - Great Falls
June 14 Thursday - EWH3
June 15 Friday - Full Moon
June 16 Saturday - Mt Vernon (10am)
June 16 Saturday - DCH4 (2pm)
June 17 Sunday - BAH3

Baltimore-Annapolis H3 is holding their 1000th Trail celebration on a camping trip.  It'll be June 8-10.  Details Here.

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground!

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#1126 -- Sunday, May 20, 2007 3:00pm -- Poop's Revenge

You stuck us with these shitty names, now your going to pay with a shitty trail.

Hares: Snap Crackle Poop, Poop Weiner, Poop Turkey, Gimme a Poop (Dick)

Brew Crew: Chewbacca & Knee Deep

Location:  Safeway off of Anderson Rd at 7401 Colshire Dr, McLean VA.

Cost: $5.00

Runners trail: A-A', bag vehicle provided.  This is a wet trail.  PI factor is High, bring long pants, Ivy Block (not likely to cut it) Technu etc. Dry shoes a must.  Wouldn't be a bad idea to bring dry set of everything you wear.  Flash lights useful.

Walkers trail:  See the description of the runners trail.   This is a wet, shiggy trail.  PI factor is High, bring long pants, Ivy Block (not likely to cut it) Technu etc. Dry shoes a must.  Wouldn't be a bad idea to bring dry set of everything you wear.  Flash lights useful.

Dog Friendly: Tough dogs that can be lifted on occasion

Stroller Friendly:  Only if your child's name is Noah and you don't mind setting him adrift.

D-erections

Driving

From Points South
Get thyself onto 495 North towards Bethesda.  Take the Rt 123 North Exit (exit 46B) toward McLean.  Turn Right onto Anderson Rd.  Safeway will be 0.31 miles on your right.

From Points North
Take 495 South to Northern Virginia.  Following signs to I-66 East, take the LEFT exit 45B toward Rt 267.  Bear right on the exit and take Exit 19A for 123 South to Tysons Corner.  At the light for 123 go straight onto Anderson Rd.  Safeway is 0.31 miles up Anderson on the right.

From DC
Get thyself on I66 East.  Take Exit 67 onto Rt 267 following signs for Dulles Airport. Stay to the right on 267.   Take Exit 19A for Rt 123 South to Tysons Corner.  After crossing under 267 turn Left onto Anderson Rd.  Safeway is 0.31 miles up Anderson on the right.


Metro
Yellow or Blue line to Crystal City.  Get on the Rt 23A bus at 1:36 P.M.  Exit at Chain Bridge Rd & Anderson Rd at 2:28.  Walk 0.31 miles up Anderson Rd.  Wait for wankers and hash.

Orange line to Ballston.  Get on the Rt 23A Bus at 2:07 P.M.  Exit at Chain Bridge Rd & Anderson Rd at 2:28.  Walk 0.31 miles up Anderson Rd.  Wait for wankers and hash.

OnOnOn:
The Pub
6827 Redmond Drive
McLean, VA  22101
703.442.9864

Specials:
$2.50 Pints of cheap draft beer
$5.50 "small pitchers" of cheap draft beer
$10.50 "large pitchers" of cheap draft beer
FREE happy-hour-style wings and eggrolls
Inexpensive (and short) menu of more substantial food
Hares are working on a rail drink special


OnOn,
Blows A Tranny

WH4 hash 1125 - May 13th, 3:00 pm - Columbia Pike/Arlington Village

I'm still on vacation (nyah nyah) and out of the loop, so you get even less intro material here. 

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Upcumming Trails

5/20 -- Snap Crackle Poop, Poop Weiner, Poop Turkey -- McLean
5/27 -- Every hasher but you -- Courthouse Metro
5/28  -- Memorial Day trail & Picnic -- Near Ballston
6/4 -- Takes it up the Eh -- Bethesda

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Tour duh Hash Schedule

June 10 Sunday  - OTH4
June 11 Monday - WH4
June 12 Tuesday - SHIT
June 13 Wednesday - Great Falls
June 14 Thursday - EWH3
June 15 Friday - Full Moon
June 16 Saturday - Mt Vernon (10am)
June 16 Saturday - DCH4 (2pm)
June 17 Sunday - BAH3

Baltimore-Annapolis H3 is holding their 1000th Trail celebration on a camping trip.  It'll be June 8-10.  Details Here.

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground!

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May 13, 2007, 3:00 p.m. – Columbia Pike/Arlington Village

It's time for the Happy MILF's Day! Hash – dress as your inner Hottie Mom or as the Sugar Daddy who will win her heart (ahem) for a few hours.

Hares: It's Butt F*ing Time, Chewbacca, Tit-ly Winks, Obeastiologist, Duck Duck Bush

Brew Crew: Peter C*ck'n'Tail and Hungry Hungry Homo

Cost: $5

Start: 1101 Cleveland St. South (one block south of Columbia Pike), Arlington, VA

http://tinyurl.com/2urmgr

D-erections:

Metro:  Take the Blue or Yellow Line to Pentagon City. Catch the 16G bus (westbound via Columbia Pike) at 2:19pm for a 2:27pm arrival or at 2:49pm for a 2:57pm arrival and de-bus at the Barton St. stoplight; walk one more block west and go left (south) on Cleveland for one block to 11th and Cleveland.  http://www.wmata.com/timetables/va/16g-w.pdf

Driving: Metro is best. Some people driving like to take I-395 to exit 8A (Washington Blvd./Columbia Pike) and take the quick tricky turn to Columbia Pike (Route 244) westward for .7 miles to Cleveland St.; some like to take Glebe Road south from Route 50 or the Ballston area to a left onto Columbia Pike eastward for .5 miles to Cleveland St. Either way, from Cleveland and Columbia Pike, it is one block south on Cleveland.

Miscellaneous: This trail is A to A', bag vehicle provided.

Bring dry shoes. PI possible.

Dog friendly? Yes.

Stroller friendly? If you don't mind getting the wheels dirty.

OnOnOn:
L.A. Bar & Grill
2530 Columbia Pike
Arlington, VA 22204
Tel. 703-685-1560

Specials include $3 margaritas, $2.22 High Lifes, and five appetizers for $5 or less including shrimp, nachos, and chicken fingers.


OnOn,
Blows A Tranny

WH4 hash 1124 - May 6th, 3:00 pm - Dupont Circle Metro

I'm on vacation this week, so I really can't be bothered to come up with anything funny or educational.  Fortunately, mismanagement has asked me to do what I do best -- complain.

People, bring a damn mug to the hash. We're tired of supplying you with pretty new red Solo cups at the start, beer check and ending circle of every damned trail.  So go to walmart and buy a plastic cup, or go to EWH3 and buy one of their nice mugs for $2.  Or commit to having no life, spend $125 for a nice WH4 25-run mug.  There's no better way to spend $125, not even on bail.

Also, last chance to sign up for the Mount Vernon H3 AGM.  Go see old folks like Put It Out and CRAFTY get drunk.

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Upcumming Trails

5/13 -- Duck Duck Bush, It's Buttfucking Time!, Obeastiologist, Titly Winks, Chewbacca -- Arlington Heights
5/20 -- Snap Crackle Poop, Poop Weiner, Poop Turkey -- McLean
5/27 -- Every hasher but you -- Courthouse Metro
5/28  -- Memorial Day trail & Picnic -- Near Ballston

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Tour duh Hash Schedule

June 10 Sunday  - OTH4
June 11 Monday - WH4
June 12 Tuesday - SHIT
June 13 Wednesday - Great Falls
June 14 Thursday - EWH3
June 15 Friday - Full Moon
June 16 Saturday - Mt Vernon (10am)
June 16 Saturday - DCH4 (2pm)
June 17 Sunday - BAH3

Baltimore-Annapolis H3 is holding their 1000th Trail celebration on a camping trip.  It'll be June 8-10.  Details Here.

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground!

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May 6, 2007, Dupont Circle Metro
4th Annual Tit 'n' Snatch Hash