Announcements

Trail news you can abuse.


WH4 hash 1123 - April 29nd, 3:00 pm - Braddock Rd Metro

I would like to introduce you wankers to the joy of the aptonym, which is a term used for people whose names bear a strange or funny level of appropriateness to their occupation or hobbies.  For example, a florist named Iris would be an aptonym, as would a podiatrist named Dr Foote.  Some good examples:

Dr Kevin De Cock is the current HIV director at the World Health Organization.

Dr.  Dick Chopp is an urologist in Austin, TX. 

Dr. Harry Beaver is a retired gynecologist who used to practice in Fairfax, VA.

The last place finisher in the 2007 National Marathon was Stephen Fattman.

See, there was some r*nning content!!

----------------
Upcumming Trails

5/6 -- Runway Snatch, Snatch Shot, Titly Winks, Tit-ka-boob -- Dupont Circle
5/13 -- Duck Duck Bush, It's Buttfucking Time!, Obeastiologist, Titly Winks, Chewbacca -- Arlington Heights
5/20 -- Snap Crackle Poop, Poop Weiner, Poop Turkey -- McLean


----------------

Mount Vernon H3 AGM
is cumming up!

When: May 4th - 6th
Where: Fredericksburg, Virginia. 
Cost:  $50.   Also, hotel rate is $98 a night.
MVH3 details here.

Tour duh Hash
is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!

Tour duh Hash Schedule

June 10 Sunday  - OTH4
June 11 Monday - WH4
June 12 Tuesday - SHIT
June 13 Wednesday - Great Falls
June 14 Thursday - EWH3
June 15 Friday - Full Moon
June 16 Saturday - Mt Vernon (10am)
June 16 Saturday - DCH4 (2pm)
June 17 Sunday - BAH3

Baltimore-Annapolis H3 is holding their 1000th Trail celebration on a camping trip.  It'll be June 8-10.  Details Here.

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground! 
Better start getting into swimsuit and/or nudity shape!

--------------

April 29, 2007, Braddock Rd Metro

Hares: Bob Loblaw, Wooly Mammaries, Turbo Twat

Start: Braddock Rd Metro

Cost: $5

Brew Crew: Please Step Away From The Whores & HOT LUNCH
 

D-erections:
Metro: Take the Blue or Yellow line trains to Braddock Rd, and head in the direction of chalk marks

Driving: 
 
From DC/points inside the beltway:  Take George Washington Parkway to Old Town Alexandria.  Turn Right on Wythe St.  Take Wythe all the way to the Metro.

Alternatively, take I-395 to the King St exit, going East.  Turn left at Braddock Rd and take it all the way to the Metro.
 
From Beltway:  Take the beltway to the Rt 1 exit and go north.  Continue on Rt 1/Patrick St to Wythe St.  Turn left on Wythe and go to the Metro.

Miscellaneous: This trail is A to A prime, bag vehicle provided.

Flashlight? A must!@!  Along with dry shoes….

Dog Friendly? Yes, hares will assist you with navigating the difficult parts.

Stroller Friendly? Yes and the hares will assist you with navigating the difficult parts.

OnOnOn:
Rustico Restaurant & Bar
827 Slaters Lane
Alexandria, VA 22314
(703) 224-5051

http://www.rusticorestaurant.com/index.htm


OnOn,
Blows A Tranny


WH4 hash 1122 - April 22nd, 3:00 pm - Wolftrap

This weekly email is ostensibly to inform the hash of upcoming trails and hash events, but seeing as how it's a lot more fun to use this space to talk about assfucking or various hashers' sexual inadequacy, that's usually what gets written here. 

However, this week I've decided to break with tradition and write something USEFUL at the top of the page.  (Trail info is in its normal place so feel free to skip down.  Go ahead.)

(Fuckers.)

Okay, now that we're rid of them, here's the skinny.  First and foremost, WH4 needs you to help represent your kennel at this Saturday's Hash O Limp Dicks .  So sign up via evite  and bring your money and your A-game to Remington's on Saturday night. 

Secondly, the DC Tour duh Hash is coming soon to a hash near you.  Starting June 10, the Tour duh Hash will be hitting 9 trails in 8 days and covering the breadth of what DC hashing has to offer.  It'll even include some birthday celebrations for wanker and hash alike. 

The White House H3 camping trip is being planned for the last weekend in July, once again at Golden Rock, where it has been at years' past.  Rumor has it this campout will involve beer and tubing.  Hopefully I'll be able to confirm those rumors in a later trail news.  Stay tuned.

Finally, for those who made it this far, the weather forecast for Sunday is: 70, sunny, with a 75% chance of intoxication.

----------------
Upcumming Trails

4/29 -- Bob Loblaw, Wooly Mammaries, Turbo Twat -- Old Town Alexandria
5/6 -- Runway Snatch, Snatch Shot, Titly Winks, Tit-ka-boob -- Dupont Circle
5/13 -- Duck Duck Bush, It's Buttfucking Time!, Obeastiologist, Titly Winks -- Arlington Heights

-----------------


Announcements:


Mount Vernon H3 AGM is cumming up!

When: May 4th - 6th
Where: Fredericksburg, Virginia. 
Cost:  $50.   Also, hotel rate is $98 a night.
MVH3 details here.

Tour duh Hash
is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!

Tour duh Hash Schedule

June 10 Sunday  - OTH4
June 11 Monday - WH4
June 12 Tuesday - SHIT
June 13 Wednesday - Great Falls
June 14 Thursday - EWH3
June 15 Friday - Full Moon
June 16 Saturday - Mt Vernon (10am)
June 16 Saturday - DCH4 (2pm)
June 17 Sunday - BAH3

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is in June!  Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground! 
Better start getting into swimsuit and/or nudity shape!

--------------

April 22, 2007, Wolftrap

Hares: I Dream of Weenie, Yellow Submarine, Read My Lips and Bad Ditch

Start:  End of Westwood Center Dr. off of Rt. 7 and the Toll Road

Cost: $5

Brew Crew: Mellow Foreskin Cheese & Turbo Twat
 

D-erections:
Metro: Sorry, not entirely metro accessible.  Closest metro is going to be either East Falls Church (6 miles) or West Falls Church (5 miles).
 
Driving: 
 
From DC/points inside the beltway:  Take 66 to the Toll Road (267).  Follow the toll road towards Wolftrap- DO NOT get on the airport road.  Go through toll and take the first exit (Rt. 7) towards Tysons Corner.  Left at the light on Rt. 7.  Cross over the Toll Road and take a right at the first light on Westwood Center Dr.  Proceed to the end of Westwood, across the cul-de-sac and behind the office building to the parking structure. 
 
If you are too cheap to go through the toll, stay on 66 to Rt. 7 exit towards Tysons and go all the way to the last light before the toll road and take a left on Westwood Ctr. Dr.
 
From Beltway/MD/VA:  Take the beltway to Dulles Toll Road.  Follow the toll road towards Wolftrap- DO NOT get on the airport road.  Go through toll and take the first exit (Rt. 7) towards Tysons Corner.  Left at the light on Rt. 7.  Cross over the Toll Road and take a right at the first light on Westwood Center Dr..  Proceed to the end of Westwood, across the cul-de-sac and behind the office building to the parking structure. 
 
If you are too cheap to go through the toll, stay on 66 to Rt. 7 exit towards Tysons and go all the way to the last light before the toll road and take a left on Westwood Ctr. Dr.

Miscellaneous: A to A.  Dog friendly.  Not so stroller friendly.  Lot's of shiggy and therefore PI potential.  Flashlight and dry bag are a good idea.
 
OnOnOn:
Ringmasters
8607 Westwood Center Dr
Vienna 22182
At Sheraton Tysons Dr
Phone: 703-448-4444
 
Specials:  They're not open on Sundays.  They're opening just for us Hashers- that's special!!

OnOn,
Blows A Tranny
WH4 Hoopy Frood


WH4 hash 1121 - April 15th, 3:00 pm - Lubber Run Park

Congrats, you've gone to a hash. You've run a couple trails, and done a down-down or four. But are you a hasher ? (Note, this is a rhetorical question, and not part of a test to determine if you get a mug from Okinawa H3.) Recently I've become concerned. When signing work emails, I sometimes I have to delete "Bl" or "Tr" after I remember I'm not sending a hash email. On trail, I'll look around to check if people near me on the hashcount are around to see if I'll move up in the rankings. Evite and the hareline have become indispensable tools for managing my life. Maybe you have similar symptoms -- like nearly spouting a profane statement when a coworker asks what time it is, or mis-correcting the word "come" on your first-grade class' spelling test.

So I've come up with a half-minded, half-assed way to manage your hashing condition. Note that there's no cure for hashing. You can only hope to contain it. Ask your GM if this program is right for you. Side effects may include going in peace, getting a piece, and a slight heading and feeling of dehydration in the morning.

Without further ado...

1. Lubricate
2. ?
3. Collect Underpants
4. ?
5. Lubricate
6. ?
7. Profit!!

Wait, what was I talking about again?

Oh well, speaking of confused hippies, the 4th Annual Earth Day trail is this Sunday. This time last year, Hokie got shat on my a lemur. Let's hope for a repeat!

----------------
Upcumming Trails

4/22 -- I Dream of Weenie and friends -- Vienna
4/29 -- Bob Loblaw, Wooly Mammaries, Turbo Twat -- Old Town Alexandria
5/6 -- Runway Snatch, Snatch Shot, Titly Winks, Tit-ka-boob -- TBA

-----------------


Announcements:


Mount Vernon H3 AGM is cumming up!

When: May 4th - 6th
Where: Fredericksburg, Virginia.
Cost: $50. Also, hotel rate is
$98 a night.
MVH3 details here.

Tour de Hash is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is soon! Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground! Better start getting into swimsuit and/or nudity shape!

--------------

WH4 Hash # 1121: 4th Annual Earth Day Hash

April 15, 2007, Lubber Run Park

Yep, its here again... Lumber JackOff and Greenpiece of Ass have nothing better to do than recycle/reduce/reuse that same damn trail you've been forced to run the past 4 years... Perhaps they should get a life and hug a tree or something... but hey, there will be beer.


Hares: Lumber JackOff & Greenpiece of Ass
Start: Out front of the Outback Steakhouse on Rte 50 & Park Dr. Time: 3:00 PM
Cost: $5
Brew Crew: Thong Butt Not Forgotten & Gay Rod


D-erections:
Metro: In true hash fashion, the Earth Day trail isn't metro accessible.... but you can explore new modes of public transit.

Bus: Metro to the Rosslyn or Courthouse Metros. Catch the 4B bus towards 7-Corners (2:50pm Rosslyn, 2:55pm Courthouse)... Arrive @ start at 3:11pm.

Driving: Get yourself in a carpool and go to Rte 50 in NoVA. From the East, drive past George Mason and look for the light at Park Dr. Turn right at the light, park and look for wanks. From the West, go past Carlin Springs Rd, take a left at the light on Park Dr, park & look for wanks.

Miscellaneous: A to A Flashlight? YES - we like dark wet places... Dog Friendly? Walkers Yes. Stroller Friendly? Walkers Yes.

OnOnOn:
El Ranchero
4617 Wilson Blvd
Arlington, VA
(703) 524-1010
Specials ('til 7pm):
$2 Miller Lite/Yeungling
$4 Sangria
$5 Margaritas

OnOn,
Blows A Tranny
2007 WH4 Hareraiser


WH4 hash 1120 - April 8th, 3:00 pm - Glover Park

Wankers, I'm skipping the "funny" this week. I know, it's tough. Your Thursday workday is going to seem 5 or 6 seconds longer.

But because I'm resourceful, I'll provide some links, Digby-stylee. After all, I know web fu. Whoa.

Yoga with the dog
-- acceptable hash behavior! (Unless you mean "dog" and "yoga" literally.)

Wild Pitch -- Warning, also not an innuendo. Huh-huh. Innuendo.


And finally, help $50 Bitch update the hash directory. Email her at fiftydollarb AT hotmail.com if you're not on it, or if you don't think your info is updated. You can even request a copy from her. But, please, no stalking. Or if you do, set up a safeword first.

----------------
Upcumming Trails

4/15 -- Lumber Jack Off & Friends -- TBA
4/22 -- I Dream of Weenie and friends -- Vienna
4/29 -- Bob Lowblaw, Wooly Mammaries, Turbo Twat -- TBA
-----------------


Announcements:

OTH3 is holding their 16th annual Hash-a-thon in April. Come test your mettle, skills, and halfmindedness with the wankers at OTH3.

When: Saturday, April 7th, 2007 starting @ 12:00 noon
Trail 1 = 12 PM, Trail 2 = 2 PM, then lunch,
Trail 3 = 4 PM, Trail 4 = 6 pm, then Dinner

Where: Swans Creek Elementary School, 17700 Wayside Drive, Dumfries Va
22026

Cost: $25.00 / Tshirts $15.00

Mount Vernon H3 AGM is cumming up!

When: May 4th - 6th
Where: Fredericksburg, Virginia.
Cost: $50 until April 1st. Also, hotel rate is $98 a night.
MVH3 details here.

Tour de Hash
is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is soon! Watch for details!

WH4 Camping Trip will be the weekend of July 28th at Golden Rock campground!
Better start getting into swimsuit and/or nudity shape!

--------------

WH4 Hash 1120 -- Extra Special Easter Edition!

Your hares (bunnies for this week) will be hiding special treats for you to find along the trail. They won't be difficult to spot, as we don't want kiddies to find any left-behind goodies.

DATE: Sunday, April 8th, 2007 - 3:00 p.m.

BUNNIES: Viva Las Labias, Pubic Housing, Penal Knieval, Donkey Punch, Blows A Tranny

COST: $5

BREW CREW: Hot Lunch & Snap Crackle Poop

LOCATION: Guy Mason rec area in Glover Park neighborhood of DC, near corner of Calvert St & Wisconsin Ave NW

DIRECTIONS: Guy Mason is a recreation area with a baseball field and a playground. Meet in the parking lot adjacent.

by car -- too many ways to list. Find your way to Wisconsin Ave and go towards about 2500 Wisconsin. There is limited parking at the Rec Area that supposed to be only for its users. If you're worried, park on the street or in a public lot. Parking won't be bad on a Sunday afternoon.

by bus -- The 30, 32, 34, 35, and 36 bus all go up Wisconsin, starting from a number of convenient stops along the Orange and Blue lines. The trip planner is useful if you choose to take a bus. Get off the bus at corner of Wisconsin & Calvert.

by metro -- closest metro stop is Cleveland Park, which is about 0.80 miles away. There will be no chalk from Cleveland Park. You're on your own so bring a map!!

Miscellaneous: Dog and stroller friendly. Ask for help from the hares for a stroller route. Dry (and warm!) clothes and shoes recommended.


OnOnOn:
Kavanagh Pizza Pub
2400 Wisconsin Ave NW
Washington, DC

Specials? I'm special.

OnOn,
Blows A Tranny
2007 WH4 Hareraiser