Announcements

Trail news you can abuse.


hash #1119 April 1, 2007, East Falls Church Metro

Some of you might know that I'm a bit of a web addict. I'm employed by Uncle Sam, so that might explain it a little. But I think I've come to the end of the internet. This was the site I found:

http://www.mormon-underwear.com/

I really can't imagine what else is past this frontier. To wit:

"... while mormons believe that masturbation is not an appropriate activity, they learn this in their church classes, not through their underwear."

How can they say that?! Every OTHER site on the internet practically compels the opposite result.

For more interesting info on 'garments' the Slate Explainer Explains: http://www.slate.com/id/2161933/

(Also, the latest explainer is fun if you know my nerd name.)

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Trails, virgin hares, emails, trail news wh4pudjam at gmail.com BLAH BLAH BLAH

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4/8 -- Viva Las Labias, Blows A Tranny, Penal Knieval, Pubic Housing -- Glover Park (updated location)
4/15 -- I Dream of Weenie and friends -- Vienna
4/22 -- NEED HARES
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Announcements:

 OTH3 is holding their 16th annual Hash-a-thon in April. Come test your mettle, skills, and halfmindedness with the wankers at OTH3.

When: Saturday, April 7th, 2007 starting @ 12:00 noon
Trail 1 = 12 PM, Trail 2 = 2 PM, then lunch,
Trail 3 = 4 PM, Trail 4 = 6 pm, then Dinner

Where: Swans Creek Elementary School, 17700 Wayside Drive, Dumfries Va
22026

Cost: $25.00 / Tshirts $15.00

Mount Vernon H3 AGM is cumming up!

When: May 4th - 6th
Where: Fredericksburg, Virginia.
Cost: $50 until April 1st. Also, hotel rate is $69 a night until March 31st, then it jumps to $98

MVH3 details here.

Tour de Hash is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is soon! Watch this spot for details!

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WH4 Hash # 1119: April 1, 2007, East Falls Church Metro

It's YOUR Hash!

That's right Fool! It's your day, and we know you're proud of yourself. What better way to celebrate your own foolishness than by showing up for this April Fool's Day trail, its guaranteed* to be full of surprises. Only the wise hash fool will be able to figure out this trail's trickery and tomfoolery.

Feel free to wear some Fool's clothing… or, if your roommate has already moved out, wear something Jester-ish. Of course… WE PITY THE FOOL!

*Guarantee not guaranteed, warranted, or otherwise held liable for damages.

Hares: Winn Dick Me, Bob Loblaw, Tits, Can't Fuck Dust

Start: East Falls Church Metro

Time: 3:00 PM

Cost = $5.00

D-erections:

Metro: Orange line trains to East Falls Church station, follow the chalk, and look for your fellow Fools.

Driving: Get yourself to I-66. From the East, exit 69 (of course!) Sycamore Ave., get into the immediate left lane, turn left at 1st light and turn left again into the Metro parking lot, look for Fools. From I-66 West, exit 69 (again!), merge onto Fairfax Drive, go past Lee Highway (Rte 29), continue on Fairfax Drive crossing over I-66, and look for right turn into Metro parking lot, park, and look for Fools.

Miscellaneous: A to A'' – about a 10 minute walk between them. Parking at Clare and Don's and walking to EFC Metro is the best plan if you drive.

Flashlight? YES otherwise you are a FOOL

Dog Friendly? Yes, and just like sex, there are brief moments of difficulty.

Stroller Friendly? Yes… ask the hares, they'll assist you.

OnOnOn:

(The New) Clare and Don's Beach Shack
130 N. Washington Street
Falls Church, VA 22046
(703) 532-9283

Specials:

$2 PBR cans
$2.50 Miller Lite draft
$2.50 Yuengling cans
$4 Buffalo Wings
$8.50 Blackened Grouper sandwich, fries and slaw.


WH4 hash 1118 Sunday, March 25 3:00 -- Glenmont Metro

Poetry time with Blows A Tranny

Harriettes don't charge by the hour,
to win her you'll have to wow 'er.
To get lots of sex:
lay plenty of checks!
And don't go easy on the flour.

---

FRBs, put chalk on the trails!
It's as important as pilsners or ales!
The back of the pack
gets all out of whack,
And I don't wanna hear their tales!


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Now signing up hares for Monday summertime trails!  email me blowsatranny AT gmail.com

Remember, you can get trail info by dialing 202-pudjam-0 (zero) or by sending a text message to wh4pudjam AT gmail.com

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4/1 -- Can't Fuck Dust, Bob Loblaw, Tits, Winn Dick Me -- East Falls Church
4/8 -- Viva Las Labias, Blows A Tranny, Penal Knieval, Pubic Housing -- Alexandria
4/15 -- I Dream of Weenie and friends -- Vienna
-----------------

Announcements:

 OTH3 is holding their 16th annual Hash-a-thon in April. Come test your mettle, skills, and halfmindedness with the wankers at OTH3.

When: Saturday, April 7th, 2007 starting @ 12:00 noon
Trail 1 = 12 PM, Trail 2 = 2 PM, then lunch,
Trail 3 = 4 PM, Trail 4 = 6 pm, then Dinner

Where: Swans Creek Elementary School, 17700 Wayside Drive, Dumfries Va
22026

Cost: $25.00 / Tshirts $15.00

Mount Vernon H3 AGM is cumming up!

When: May 4th - 6th
Where: Fredericksburg, Virginia. 
Cost:  $50 until April 1st.  Also, hotel rate is $69 a night until March 31st, then it jumps to $98

MVH3 details here.

Tour de Hash is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!

White House H3 20th Analversary Celebration is soon!  Watch for details!

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HASH #1118: Glenmont Metro, Wheaton (Silver Spring), MD  20906
              (Hey!! At least it's "Metro Accessible"!!)


DATE: Sunday, March 25th, 2007 - 3:00 p.m.

HARES: "And How's Her Bush", "Bavarian Bush" "Designer Bush" and any other "Bush" I can find!!

COST: $5

BREW CREW: Hungry Hungry Homo, Yellow Submarinee

LOCATION:  Glenmont Metro, Layhill Road level)

 

DIRECTIONS:  

 
From the Beltway:

Find your way to the beltway… take the exit for Connecticut Avenue and go NORTH (heading toward Rockville, not toward DC). Continue on Connecticut Avenue through Kensington. Connecticut will split off to the LEFT (as University Boulevard bears to the right). Take a RIGHT onto Randolph Road then a LEFT onto Georgia Avenue. After you pass Layhill Road and the Metro Station… Take a RIGHT onto Glenallan Avenue then a RIGHT into the Metro Station.

 

Metro: Glenmont Metro is the last stop on the Red Line (opposite of Shady Grove direction).

 

Or check the old fashioned way… GET A MAP!!
( Glenmont Metro, Silver Spring, MD  20906)


(ADC Map: Montgomery County MD Map 30, G10 MC)

 

Miscellaneous:

This trail is A to A' so that means… bring dry clothes and shoes. It might get chilly… so bring long sleeves. If you have to wee-wee… bring TP!!

 

Oh… and don't forget to bring those… 'Beautiful Young Female Virgins'!!

 

On On On:

Stained Glass Pub - 12510 Layhill Rd, Silver Spring, MD

Stained Glass Pub is ten feet from the Layhill exit of the metro!!

(301) 933-4444

Specials:

$ 3.00 Domestic Drafts

$ 9.95 Domestic Pitchers

 

Cheap Eats… (which translated… the manager would work any specials… but they do have cheap pizzas!!)

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On On,
Blows A Tranny


Urgent News Bulletin!

We interrupt your St Paddy's Day drinking with the following important announcement regarding tomorrow's trail. Slurpee has gotten us quite a special at DuClaw's in Bowie -- $6 for all the beer you can drink in 2 hours. And on top of that, happy hour prices on food!

Also, in case you weren't aware, this is a joint hash with BAH3, so don't let those wankers outnumber us. So be like the Beach Boys and be true to your kennel.

Oh yeah, did I mention this? $6 for all the beer you can drink in two hours at the OnOnOn. I recommend that you trick someone into driving you out there, or bring a tent and sleeping bag and camp in Slurpee's yard after getting drunk.

As always, email wh4pudjam@gmail.com for directions on your mobile phone. Click here for full announcement.

We now resume your drinking, already in progress (obviously).


WH4 hash 1117 Sunday, March 18 3:00 -- Bowie Park 'n' Ride

So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey buddy, why the long face?"

John Kerry walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey buddy, why the long face?"

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Get out of my bar you whore!!"

(rimshot)

Try the veal. Tip your hareraiser.

Oh yeah, there's a hash or something this Sunday. St Paddy's day and all. The beer won't be green, but maybe some hungover faces will be.

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Sign up for some summer trails! Maybe in Virginia or DC? (hint hint) Send a text message from your phone for trail info to wh4pudjam@gmail.com.

 --------------

Upcoming Trails

3/25 -- And How's Her Bush -- Glenmont Metro
4/1 -- Can't Fuck Dust, Bob Loblaw, Tits
4/8 -- Viva Las Labias, Blows A Tranny, Penal Knieval, Pubic Housing

----------------


Announcements:

Tour de Hash is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!


 Also, OTH3 is holding their 16th annual Hash-a-thon in April. Come test your mettle, skills, and halfmindedness with the wankers at OTH3.

When: Saturday, April 7th, 2006 starting @ 12:00 noon
Trail 1 = 12 PM, Trail 2 = 2 PM, then lunch,
Trail 3 = 4 PM, Trail 4 = 6 pm, then Dinner

Where: Swans Creek Elementary School, 17700 Wayside Drive, Dumfries Va
22026

Cost: $25.00 / Tshirts $15.00

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Sunday -- March 18th, Bowie, MD -- Joint WH4/BAH3 Hash

WH4 #1117 / BAH3 #988 -- Bowie, MD

Fields of Green Clover and Sweet Dewey Meadows - St Paddy's Day Hash

Wear something green - or wear nothing at all!

When: March 18th, 2007 at 3pm.

Hares: Jack O'Lannery, Peace O'Chum, McDrippy, McBiscuit and McSlurpee

Cost: $5

Start: Bowie, MD in the Park and Ride lot just south of Rt 50 and 197.

D-erections:

(Metro) There ain't no metro!

(Driving from VA) Take Route 50 East towards Annapolis to exit 11, Rt 197 south. Immediately get into your left lane and turn left at Northview Drive. Over the top of the hill into the Park and Ride lot. See Wankers and park.

(Driving from MD) Take Route 50 West towards Washington to exit 11, Rt 197 south. Immediately get into your left lane and turn left at Northview Drive. Over the top of the hill into the Park and Ride lot. See Wankers and park.

Click this link to a map of the start or else cut and paste the link: http://tinyurl.com/2z65z7

Miscellaneous: A to A. Stroller friendly (w/shortcuts), dog friendly.

On-On-On:

DuClaws Brewing Company
4000 Town Center Blvd.
Bowie, MD 20716
p. 301-809-6943
http://www.duclaw.com/contact_bowie.asp
Specials: $6 all you can drink beer for 2 hours

On On,
Blows A Tranny
2007 Hareraiser, WH4


WH4 hash 1117 Sunday, March 18 3:00 -- Bowie Park 'n' Ride

So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey buddy, why the long face?"

John Kerry walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey buddy, why the long face?"

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Get out of my bar you whore!!"

(rimshot)

Try the veal. Tip your hareraiser.

Oh yeah, there's a hash or something this Sunday. St Paddy's day and all. The beer won't be green, but maybe some hungover faces will be.

--------------

Sign up for some summer trails! Maybe in Virginia or DC? (hint hint) Send a text message from your phone for trail info to wh4pudjam@gmail.com.

--------------

Upcoming Trails

3/25 -- And How's Her Bush -- Glenmont Metro
4/1 -- Can't Fuck Dust, Bob Loblaw, Tits
4/8 -- Viva Las Labias, Blows A Tranny, Penal Knieval, Pubic Housing

----------------


Announcements:

Tour de Hash is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!


 Also, OTH3 is holding their 16th annual Hash-a-thon in April. Come test your mettle, skills, and halfmindedness with the wankers at OTH3.

When: Saturday, April 7th, 2006 starting @ 12:00 noon
Trail 1 = 12 PM, Trail 2 = 2 PM, then lunch,
Trail 3 = 4 PM, Trail 4 = 6 pm, then Dinner

Where: Swans Creek Elementary School, 17700 Wayside Drive, Dumfries Va
22026

Cost: $25.00 / Tshirts $15.00

-------------

Sunday -- March 18th, Bowie, MD -- Joint WH4/BAH3 Hash

WH4 #1117 / BAH3 #988 -- Bowie, MD

Fields of Green Clover and Sweet Dewey Meadows - St Paddy's Day Hash

Wear something green - or wear nothing at all!

When: March 18th, 2007 at 3pm.

Hares: Jack O'Lannery, Peace O'Chum, McDrippy, McBiscuit and McSlurpee

Cost: $5

Start: Bowie, MD in the Park and Ride lot just south of Rt 50 and 197.

D-erections:

(Metro) There ain't no metro!

(Driving from VA) Take Route 50 East towards Annapolis to exit 13, Rt 197 south. Immediately get into your left lane and turn left at Northview Drive. Over the top of the hill into the Park and Ride lot. See Wankers and park.

(Driving from MD) Take Route 50 West towards Washington to exit 13, Rt 197 south. Immediately get into your left lane and turn left at Northview Drive. Over the top of the hill into the Park and Ride lot. See Wankers and park.

Click this link to a map of the start or else cut and paste the link: http://tinyurl.com/2z65z7

Miscellaneous: A to A. Stroller friendly (w/shortcuts), dog friendly.

On-On-On:

DuClaws Brewing Company
4000 Town Center Blvd.
Bowie, MD 20716
p. 301-809-6943
http://www.duclaw.com/contact_bowie.asp
Specials:

TBD


WH4 hash 1116 Sunday, March 11 3:00 -- Wakefield Park

This Sunday, WH4 presents a very special Early Daylight Savings trail. That's right! Thanks to the Energy Policy Act of 2005 that was enacted in order to...

Zzzzzzzzzzzz

Sorry. I'll try to keep things more lively.

Fuck! That's impossible. DST just isn't funny. In fact, it's tragic. Each spring, tens of hashers around the globe are an hour late to their Sunday trails. It's estimated that tens of gallons of beer goes undrunk by these hashers.

White Housers, please join me in the fight against Hash Tardiness. (Not to be confused with hash retardiness, which is Acceptable Hash Behavior.) To prevent HT, use the buddy system. On Saturday night, go home with a friend who will remind you to get out of bed at the proper hour and fix your clocks. (Preferably, the waking should be done with gentle nudges and caressing.)

And if you're particularly forgetful, bring home two hashers. Better safe than sorry.

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My pleas for inexperienced hares to contact me so that I can set them up with experienced wankers is having limited success. So the onus (that's with an O) is now on the alpha hares. If you want a trail date, be ready to give me the name of someone with a 2 or smaller harecount.

Once again, check out the hareline and email me at blowsatranny@gmail.com .

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Upcoming Trails

3/18 -- JackOff Lantern, Slurpee, Drip Dry, Peace O' Chum and Urinal Cake -- Bowie, Maryland
3/25 -- And How's Her Bush
4/1 -- Can't Fuck Dust, Bob Loblaw, Tits

----------------


Announcements:

Tour de Hash is coming to a trail near you, starting June 10!!


 Also, OTH3 is holding their 16th annual Hash-a-thon in April. Come test your mettle, skills, and halfmindedness with the wankers at OTH3.

When: Saturday, April 7th, 2006 starting @ 12:00 noon
Trail 1 = 12 PM, Trail 2 = 2 PM, then lunch,
Trail 3 = 4 PM, Trail 4 = 6 pm, then Dinner

Where: Swans Creek Elementary School, 17700 Wayside Drive, Dumfries Va
22026

Cost: $25.00 / Tshirts $15.00

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Hash 1116 -- Sun, Mar 11, 2007 -- Wakefield Park, Annandale, VA

When: March 11, 2007, 3pm

Hares: Thong Butt Not Forgotten, Gay-Rod, Put It Out and White Kane

Cost: $5

Start: Behind Kilroys.

D-erections:

(Metro) No buses on weekends and it's a long walk from the train

(Driving from VA or MD)

Drive on I-495/beltway to Braddock Rd West/Exit 54;
the shopping center is just outside the beltway on
your left.
--From 495 inner loop (coming from Springfield) turn
left at first light outside beltway on to Port Royal
Rd and go behind the shopping center on your right.
--From 495 outer loop (coming from Tysons) bear left
at end of ramp and cross Braddock Rd onto Port Royal
Rd. Go behind shopping center and look for wankers.

http://tinyurl.com/yp6whn

Miscellaneous: A to A'. Flashlight- Yes, Dry clothes- DEFINITELY!!!! (even for walkers!!), Stroller friendly- No, Dog friendly- tough doggies only.

Walkers should expect to get wet. Please come prepared to exert yourselves.

On-On-On:

Kilroy's

5250-A Port Royal Rd.
Springfield Virginia 22151

703-321-7733

http://www.kilroys-restaurant.com/


On On,
Blows A Tranny
2007 WH4 Hareraiser