WH4 Hash 1170 & 1171 -- Jan 31, 2008 -- Recover from the AGM and start all over again
Welcome to the 2008 White House Hash. Not to be confused with the 2008 "race" for the White House. We are however similarly replacing the Goofy leader we have now (Jackoff Lantern) and his smarter, but less often heard from running mate (Duck Duck Bush) with a number of fresh new candidates (even if some of them used to bone the Commander in Chief ). Does that make me Obama?
I am your newly "voluntordered" HareRaisor, MotorMouth. I promise more boats sinkings, more hitting on female virgins, LOUDER trails, and more drunken breakups than any of my predecessors.
Speaking of predecessors, I want to thank Blows a Tranny for allowing me to follow in his legacy. His policy of lackadaisical bitching until one of you hared a trail is what made White House function every week. But somehow his own "shitty trails" thru-out the year are up for trail of the year - but since he gets to vote on them himself, does that really count?
Prior to Tranny we had Hokie no Pokie. The Johnny Knoxville of Hashing. The next time you see him ask him where "The Hokie SH*T" is. and about the time his ex-girlfriend took applications for her replacement. Hokie also helped make "ass fucking" a Hash-Hold word.
I'm going to spare Wang Chunks any embarrassment, mainly because the joke I wanted to tell was VETO'd by congress!
I know what you are thinking.
From now on, you will be getting weekly trail announcements from me
and weekly hash trashes from Gay Guy Counter.
Think of the POSSIBILITIES!
Now for the first of many weekly rantings...
BEARS!
(no, wait, thats Colbert)
I mean
BEERS!
What is up with all of you drinking beer?
I can get much drunker drinking Captain and coke!
You go thru 6 beers even to get a buzz on.
I am running on a campaign promise this year of "Kegs of Captain in '08!"
We are a "Drinking Club with a Running Problem"
There is no mention of Beer in there!
Short cutting trail is equivalent to drinking Captain instead of beer.
Same result - less work!
"If the Keg doesn't fit, you must ACQUIT!"
O.k.,
back to Business.
COME TO THE AGM SATURDAY NIGHT.
NAKEDNESS GUARANTEED
(and not by me this time!)
Then recover Sunday morning with Bloody Marys and Mimosas at Spinal Tap and Hasher Humper's House
Then sweat it all out at the first trail of '08, hared by Incumming Mismanagement
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Hash 1170 -- Jan 27, 2008 -- 11:00 am -- AGM Recovery Run
Hares: Spinal Tap, Hasher Humper
Cost: $5
Start: Spinal Tap and Hasher Humper's House. 4101 David Ln, Alexandria, VA 22311
Directions: 395 South to Seminary Road West. Half a mile, make a left on Dawes Ave. Go to the end of the road, make a quick right on N. Stevens St. and then a quick left back onto Dawes Ave. 2 more block and make a right on David Ln. House is third on the right. Or use the damn internet
Misc: Pack away at noon. A-A. Short Trail and Cicle. Full Meal and Hangover beverages provided.
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Hash 1171 -- Jan 27, 2008 -- 3:00pm -- Incuming MisManagement take their first steps
Hares: Bob Loblaw, Peace O' Chum, Mount My Rear, One Time At Hand Camp, Private Snowball, Wooly (however you spell) Mammaries, Knee Deep Pussy High
Cost: $5
Start: Start: Parking garage on Metro Park Dr, near the intersection of Beulah St. & Franconia Springfield Parkway, Springfield VA. Directions from 395 South - take the Franconia Exit, follow signs to Franconia Rd. Go right on Fleet Dr, right on Beulah, then right on Metro Park Rd. Go into parking garage. Hash.
Directions: From 495 - exit Van Dorn St going south. Go right on Franconia Rd, left on Beulah, right on Metro Park Rd. Go into parking garage. Hash.
From metro - NOTE: this is a 1.1 mile walk. Exit Springfield Metro (Blue Line). Go east on Franconia Springfield Parkway for approx 1/2 mile. Go left on Beulah St. Left on Metro Park Rd. Go into parking garage. Hash. (we will mark the route to start in chalk for anyone coming from the metro)
Misc: A-A' with Bag Vehicle. Trail will be flat, dry, no shiggy. Duh.
OnOnOn:
Lucky's Sports Theatre
7027 Manchester Blvd
Alexandria, VA 22310
Specials - they are being cheap bastards on the food and beer special is $3 for a 16-oz Bud/Bud Light.
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